Writing Advice Unpacked: Kill Your Darlings, Not Your Story

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“Kill your darlings.”

It’s one of those pithy little phrases that writing teachers and editors love to throw around. But what the heck does that even mean?

Who are your darlings? Why do you need to kill them anyway?

Let’s start by defining the “darlings” bit.

Darlings

Parts of a story that the writer loves even though they aren’t serving the story and may even detract from it.

They can come in any form: characters, settings, subplots, settings, turns of phrase, descriptions, metaphors, similes, etc., etc., etc.

So we’re killing them because…why??

If a darling is something the writer loves, where does the concept of killing them come from?

It comes from the idea that writers get overly attached to parts of their story and then lose sight of whether or not those story elements are serving their overall goals.

For example, let’s say that an author really loves using flowery, flowing, half-page long metaphors, even though they write thrillers.

There’s a mismatch there. No matter how much the writer loves those extended metaphors, they’re unlikely to have a place in the final draft. They just don’t match the genre and or reader expectations. A successful, savvy writer is going to cut those metaphors out and make sure they meet the needs of their readers.

Of course, the writer could leave those metaphors in place, but doing so diminishes their chance of finding an agent, a publisher, or a reading (and paying) audience.

Similarly, you might find that your story is bloated with an extra subplot, or a few too many point of view characters. Perhaps the first person narration contains poetic language that doesn’t feel right for your teenage protagonist.

You might have a few scenes that simply don’t need to be there—either because they distract from the narrative flow or because they fail to move the story forward.

“Darlings” can be anywhere, and sometimes it’s hard to spot them.

Go ahead and show those darlings whose boss…

So…how do we actually use this advice?

We’ve established what it means to kill your darlings, but if darlings are things that we love, how do you know what’s actually serving our stories and what needs to be killed off?

Honestly, it’s easier said than done. Why? It’s nearly impossible to be objective about our own work.

Sometimes, writers get defensive, insisting that everything serves a purpose. They don’t need to cut anything, ever. Sometimes writers go in the opposite direction. They are so afraid of leaving in something that doesn’t belong they start cutting indiscriminately. I’ve even heard of one writer who thought that they had to cut everything they loved just to make sure they didn’t have any darlings left behind.

That sounds miserable and it’s 100% unnecessary. There are steps you can take to evaluate your own work and make informed decisions about what to keep and what to cut.

How to kill your darlings without killing everything you love about your story:

#1 - Know your genre & reader expectations

The best offense is a good defense. In other words, do your research and make sure you know the conventions for your genre.

Know your target readers’ tolerance for flowery language, description, internal processing, and other story elements. Then, adjust your writing style accordingly. Writing to reader expectations doesn’t mean cutting out everything you love. It just means knowing how much you can get away with and when you need to write with restraint. If you’re feeling a big mismatch between your style and your readers’ expectations, then it might be time to think about writing in a new genre.

#2 - Give yourself time & space to process

If you have time to take a break between writing and editing—do it. Taking an extended break between writing and editing can give you emotional distance and allow you to see what is really serving your story and what can be cut.

If you don’t have the time to take a break, there are some other mental tricks you can use to give yourself emotional distance. Try changing the font or printing out your draft. Changing the modality can force you to literally look at your manuscript in a new way.

#3 - Educate yourself on elements of strong writing

Research the craft of writing. Read books & blog posts. Take classes. Participate in workshopping groups or trade critiques with a writing friend.

As you learn and practice the craft of writing, you’ll develop the skills needed to evaluate your writing with a critical eye and determine what isn’t working for your manuscript.

A few of my favorite craft books can be found here, here, & here. [Note: these are affiliate links. I only recommend products that I actually own, use, and genuinely recommend!]

#4 - Get feedback from readers you trust & respect

At the end of the day, it’s nearly impossible to view our writing with objectivity. Our books are our babies and even professional editors need help when it comes to revision. Whether you find a critique partner, a writing mentor, a professional editor, getting external feedback is invaluable. The key is to find someone who knows your genre, enjoys it, and can give you insightful, actionable feedback that moves your story forward. If you find those qualities in a critique partner, treasure them! Otherwise, consider hiring a professional editor to assess your manuscript. A good editor will celebrate the parts of your story that are working and gently point out the darlings that need to be executed before you move forward in your publishing journey.

Not sure if you need to kill your darlings?

Looking for the kind of feedback that moves your story forward?

Reach out, I’m here to help!

FYI: This post contains affiliate links. If you use these links to buy something we may earn a commission. For more information click here and thanks, as always, for your support!